It's weird how becoming an adult changes our whole relationship with holidays. We have to make it up as we go along. As a kid, I always had the tree, the ancient baubles, the lights along the eaves, the family gatherings at least while us kids were still home. Then I moved out of my parent's house and the cousins all got married and/or moved away. I didn't buy a tree or decorate until I got married and even then it was weirder than usual because Jeff and I were Baha'is and didn't "celebrate" Christmas. My in-laws were awkward about it as they'd give us tree ornaments as gifts. Of course, we always showed up, appetites in tow, for the family parties. The in-laws were nominally Catholics. In fact, a brother-in-law was Persian and in deference to his Muslim beginnings, hung a painting of Mohammad over the liquor bar. Actually, it was all rather amusing and well-meaning. Last night's party at my daughter's house, her husband and brother both received heirloom jewelry from their grandmother. The un-married brother got Grandpa's wedding band. I asked him and his girlfriend if he thought that was a hint. His SO laughed and said, "Everything is a hint these days." Families! They make life interesting. Merry Christmas, Paul.
Thank you Paul......I started my Christmas morning today reading your essay. Your words and photos really touched me, they made me feel less alone in this fucked up world. Powerful memories surround this day, some of them very sad, but I will do my best "not to live in the past, but to honor it".
It's weird how becoming an adult changes our whole relationship with holidays. We have to make it up as we go along. As a kid, I always had the tree, the ancient baubles, the lights along the eaves, the family gatherings at least while us kids were still home. Then I moved out of my parent's house and the cousins all got married and/or moved away. I didn't buy a tree or decorate until I got married and even then it was weirder than usual because Jeff and I were Baha'is and didn't "celebrate" Christmas. My in-laws were awkward about it as they'd give us tree ornaments as gifts. Of course, we always showed up, appetites in tow, for the family parties. The in-laws were nominally Catholics. In fact, a brother-in-law was Persian and in deference to his Muslim beginnings, hung a painting of Mohammad over the liquor bar. Actually, it was all rather amusing and well-meaning. Last night's party at my daughter's house, her husband and brother both received heirloom jewelry from their grandmother. The un-married brother got Grandpa's wedding band. I asked him and his girlfriend if he thought that was a hint. His SO laughed and said, "Everything is a hint these days." Families! They make life interesting. Merry Christmas, Paul.
all those past Christmas's show up today, don't they.
Thank you Paul......I started my Christmas morning today reading your essay. Your words and photos really touched me, they made me feel less alone in this fucked up world. Powerful memories surround this day, some of them very sad, but I will do my best "not to live in the past, but to honor it".
Really great piece to read on Christmas morning. Thanks.
You're welcome. I enjoyed your post too. Christmas is indeed about the kids, isn't it. That's when the strongest emotionally memories take place.